Monday, June 9, 2014

Step-Up to Commenting!


Guest Post by Samantha, Aashi, and Shayna



In class, we learned how to write a Step-Up to Writing Paragraph. A Step-Up to Writing Paragraph is structured and uses color. Here is a sample paragraph Mrs. Yollis wrote about her Uncle Don.


Here is a chart of the colors and what they represent:





Recently, Mrs. Yollis and students have started leaving comments using this method. Here is Mrs. Yollis' comment to Samantha about the Moorish Idol fish. Samantha asked Mrs. Yollis to name her favorite Hawaiian island. Mrs. Yollis  responded using the Step-Up to Writing format. That comment is what started the fad.





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Mrs. Yollis' fish comment to Samantha:



Out of all the islands I have visited, I like Maui the best.
First of all, I love the snorkeling on Maui. In my opinion, the reefs of Maui are the most interesting. One bay, to the north, is so wide and full of colorful fish, I could spend the entire day swimming with my humu friends and the plethora of butterfly fish that live there. Another reason I love Maui is the condo we stayed in. The building is right on the beach and the front windows of the living room and bedroom go floor to ceiling. When I go to bed at night, I am lulled to sleep by the sounds of the waves. Finally, I love the restaurants on the Valley Isle. One of our favorite eating establishments is in Lahaina. We eat at our special place a few times and love to watch the sun set on the Pacific Ocean. The restaurant has live music, so I get to enjoy some local music along with a delicious meal. As you can see, Maui holds a special place in my heart and is my favorite Hawaiian island.

Did you notice anything special about the structure of my paragraph?

Mahalo!

Mrs. Y♥llis








Samantha's comment back to Mrs. Yollis:

I thought that your comment was amazing for many reasons. First, I discovered that you used high level words such as plethora and establishments. I learned that plethora means an excessive quantity or a lot. Using higher level vocabulary raises everyone's reading level.  Next, I noticed that you used adjectives such as wide, colorful, local and delicious. It makes the paragraph more interesting. Sometime I use a thesaurus to help me find synonyms for some dull words.   Last, I noticed that you used transition words, such as first of all, another reason, and finally.  Transitions help others put the main ideas and details in order. That makes the paragraph easier to understand. In conclusion, it was interesting learning about Maui.  




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 A couple of dogs and a baby felt bad for poor Clem of Clem's Calamity, so they left a nice Step-Up to Writing Paragraph for punctured pooch. Here is a comment from Rocky, Heather's dog (Heather) and Aarna, Aashi's two year old baby sister (Aashi). Both of them used the Step-Up to Writing format.



Photo by Mr. Shareski



Aarna (Aashi)'s comment for Clem:


Here's a Step-up-to-Writing paragraph just for you. I'm telling you, get packing! Just in case this quill-ful creature doesn't listen to us....

Out of all the frightening adventures I've been on, this is going to be the toughest mission. Firstly, you should get as much help as possible. This prickly animal might want those quills to hurt all of us. Please get some things like: first aid kits, lunchboxes, camping tents, food, etc. Next, make sure you practice some easy ninja moves. If the thorny ball tries to get even one of his quills on you, you should know how to defend yourself. Practice doing some backwards somersaults on a rough but comfortable flooring, and make the best blocking position with your paws as you somersault. You need to do this so that the quills won't be able to touch your lovely body. Finally, make sure you wear some strong and firm clothing. Think about how a ninja would look, and you should wear something similar. You should: wear a medium sized jacket that you can pull on. Tighten the laces on the hood and wear tight pants and two pairs of socks. In conclusion, I think that being ready to befriend a porcupine truly requires readiness.



 Rocky (Heather's) comment for Clem:

Oh no! That must have felt horrible! 
I have never met a porcupine before, but I think that they are cute and are nice to sniff. Even so, I have some safety tips for you in a Step-up-to-Writing paragraph:


Out of all of the accidents I have seen in my life, this is the most painful.
First, if you see that mean rodent ever again, ignore him and run away. Don't even try to say hello or sniff him if you can. If you are on a walk with your humans, they are probably going to protect you. Second, you should have your humans to pluck out those quills or else that is going to hurt! Some even look deeper than some other quills. I don't think those quills are very comfortable in your muzzle. Finally, take me on any great voyages that you are planning to do. If you meet one of those prickly guys again, I will say hello to him and sniff him for you. If he loosens his muscles to shoot out those quills, I will just back away. In conclusion, you should try to avoid contact from that little animal.




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Shayna left a step-up-to-writing paragraph for Sheila's photo of Thing 1 and Thing 2, the mischievous twins.




Shayna's comment to Sheila:

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Here's a paragraph about why I like those three characters that I mentioned before.

Out of all the characters that Dr. Seuss had created, I have three favorites. My first characters are Thing 1 and Thing 2. I adore these characters because of their humorous personality. These silly creatures have funny, blue, and spiky hair with a red shirt that says which thing they are. I always laugh when I imagine their silly blue hair zooming by. My second favorite is Cindy Loo. I like Cindy Loo because of her calm and gentle attitude. Her soft voice always soothes me as I read the book she was placed in. My final character is The Lorax. The Lorax is a yellow creature with many friends. All nature is his friend. I thought The Lorax had a real meaning when he spoke the word, "Unless" in a mysterious voice. At the end of the book you find out that he meant, "Unless someone like you cares a whole lot, nothing will ever get better." Clearly, I have admired these characters for a long time and I always will. 





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This is Peter's post about subject pronouns. He wrote a step-up-to-writing paragraph to complement his post. 


Peter's Subject Pronoun Post  



Here are some examples of subject pronouns. They are words that replace names or things, like thing would be it, Peter would be he, Mrs. Yollis would be she. I am going to make up a step up to writing about subject pronouns.


   Subject Pronouns are a great way to use different words instead of Peter or Mrs. Yollis. First,  instead of using Peter,  you could use he. He has a new blog post on his blog.  He admires blogging. He thinks Mrs. Yollis' blog is grand! He thinks blogging is a wonderful way to connect with others, and learn around the world! Secondly,  other than using Mrs. Yollis, you can use she.  She has a blog that is a great place to find wonderful facts.  She publishes posts that are full of inspirational blogging ideas.  Finally, instead of using thing, you could use it.   When referring to places or things you can use the word it.  It is an incredible place to have a grand vacation, and it is called Hawaii.  It has beautiful fish like the Humuhumunukunukuapua' a (hu • mu • hu • mu• nu •ku • nu •ku • a • pu • a • 'a). If you want some facts about this amazing fish, you can go to the following post on Mrs. Yollis' blog, Mrs. Yollis' Humuhumunukunukuapua'a. The Humuhumunukunukuapua'a is Hawaii's state fish, and it is a spectacular tropical fish. At the end of the day, subject pronouns are pretty important.







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Heather also made a step-up-to-writing post. It was about prefixes and suffixes.



Heather's Prefixes and Suffixes

 Out of all the words that have prefixes and suffixes, I chose three to explain. One of my words is disagreement. I chose this word because it shows a prefix, base word, and a suffix. Dis- means not. It has almost the same meaning as un-. To agree to something means you share the same idea and think it is also correct. A synonym for that is concur. Ment- means forming nouns expressing the means or result of an action. Disagreement is a negative word. If you disagree with someone, you don't agree.Another of my words  is reappear. To reappear is to appear again because re- means again. The base word for reappear is appear. If you take off the re- and replace it with dis- it will make disappear. An antonym for reappear is also disappear. Reappear can be a positive word if you make it one, but it can also be a negative word. If a bee stung you, and another bee reappeared, that would have been using it as a negative word. Finally, I want to share the word midnight with you. As you probably guessed, mid- means middle because the first syllable is spelled mid. Midnight isn't exactly the middle of night because after midnight, the next morning starts. The antonym for midnight would be noon. If you get rid of the mid- and replaced -fall at the end of the word, it would be nightfall. The meaning of that is that the night is beginning to rise and the evening is gradually mixing into the night. Clearly, everyone can have fun changing the prefix or suffix on any base word!










What do you think of this Step-up paragraph writing?


How does the green, red, yellow color help?







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